doubt, drumming, and writing about it

In my own world, my day-to-day getting up and going to work and being an educator, I feel pretty confident.  Not overly confident (I hope) but enough to believe that I can do the work.  I try to put in the time, at the desk, in the classroom, reading and studying and keeping up on the research.  When I tell people that I am an educator, I believe it.

But I struggle with calling myself a drummer or a writer.  I am putting in the time, practicing those rhythms, writing words, reading the music book, watching other drummers, reading about writing, taking up writing challenges.  But I hesitate to say that I am . . .  I wonder what it will take to give me that confidence?  performance?  publication? 

Today I read a piece about doubt and it ended with asking a good question; if doubt is a seed, what doubts are being planting in my so that I can grow?

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goodbye july

I thought about posting the last few days but just couldn’t muster the energy.  So now, I am going to spend some quality time in this chair, on the refurbished deck, with my new KOBO and a magazine and a cold beverage.

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Saved – avoiding sunburn

We have finally reached a point in the summer when a small tube of suncreen is an important item to carry in my purse.  After the wet, cold spring and early summer we have had, this is a welcome addition.

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Saved – grace

Today is a busy one, not much time for writing, just a little quote and a reminder to enjoy the journey.

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Saving the deck

There is much going on at our house this summer.  The big project is the deck.  After 23 years of rain, snow, and a little bit of sun, it is time to do some repair.  Fortunately there are extra hands around to help with the job.  It looks like we will have a lovely new spot for sipping champagne by the time our anniversary rolls around.

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Saved – rocks

The garden project continues and the piles of rock are growing as much as the weeds.  Today I was digging a border between the garden patches and the grass – just wide enough to give the lawnmower some space.  And with each turn of the shovel, more rocks were unearthed.  I do love rocks.  They play a big part in my garden planning – small piles of rocks here and there and then this one – creating a barrier between my space and the wild.

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saved – extra hands in the kitchen

When I started this July writing challenge, I didn’t think too much about the theme – Saved.  But as the days have passed, I find myself writing about those ordinary moments that too often slip away, the day-to-day bits of live that should be saved.   And each day, I find myself enjoying this season of sharing our living space.  When I was a parent of young children, I missed many of those moments worrying about such things as a clean kitchen, getting the sheets changed, and picking up shoes.  Letting go can be such a good thing.

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Saved – a day in the garden

Elizabeth was reflecting recently on things she thought she would be, such as a good gardener.  I still think of myself as a gardener even though I have had to restart my garden annually and never get much further than those first few days of weeding and clearing the space.  I hope this year will be different.  We shall see.

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Saved – money

First of all, this is not me.  But I do love this dress from JJill.  Today I looked at this dress in person and it is just as lovely as I imagined.  But, it is not in my budget, sad but true.  So, I did what I have done for many years – I headed off to the fabric store to purchase some fabric to make a new summery dress.  It won’t be as lovely as this one – I couldn’t find a blue that I liked so I bought a dark grey linen.  Not the same but a good option.  And maybe this dress will go on sale soon.

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Saved – packed

This is how my month is feeling – packed to the gills.

At what point did vacation become a time to catch up instead of a time to slow down?

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